It's six in the morning. Martha is in the shower and I'll be driving her to work today. We're each going to 12 step meetings at the Alano Club this evening. So I'll pick her up after work. I'd rather not do the big walk at 5 or so, down to the Max station and then to the Alano Club. Sandy just left after her stay her last night. Was good to see her and visit. This visit was not stressful at all. I fixed some salad and soup for dinner. Was okay, nothing special, but I think they both liked it. I just need to start eating healthier. Need to see if I could possibly cut back on my caffiene intake and drink a bit more water. I think that would help me and my anxiety levels. I wouldn't be getting worked up just because I drank a mocha or a soda. Also need to cut back on my sodium.
Had a follow-up visit with my Neurologist yesterday. Everything in my brain seemed good. Nothing that she thought was an issue of any sort. Can't really figure out what my little constant headache is. Thinks it may be a small migraine waiting to blossom but also said my images showed no migraine going on at that time. I ended up taking some imitrex when I got home. Seemed to help the headache.
Went to therapy yesterday. Nothing special in the session. Talked a little about the money I received from my father's death. My therapist said she looked at it as a gift from God. I've never looked at it that way. I've thought of more as a curse. But perhaps it has allowed me to get to where I am and set me on a psth to a better, saner life. Yes, I've spent quite a bit of money to get here, but I wouldn't have had the money otherwise. She thinks I need to explore my thoughts on my higher power more. Can't say that I disagree. I do believe in a Higher Power. Not sure that I've allowed a Higher Power into my life. I think I've turned my back on a Higher Power and just let life happen. Not trying to be cynical, but it looks like that hasn't turned out so wonderful. So perhaps I should give a Higher Power a chance and open the door to my life and let him in.
Nothing special planned for today. I'm planning on going to a 12 step meeting at noon. I'd also like to spend a bit of time on my first step. I've been procrastinating on it and need to get it done. There is no timeline but it is holding me back from progressing in my recovery. I'm allowing myself a mental roadblock that says I can't continue my recovery work until I finish my first step. So it's time to break through that roadblock.
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