...my wife today. Was probably the best lunch I've had with her in a long time. She had gone to my meeting and dropped me off as planned. After the meeting we went to Stanford's at the mall and had lunch. Since it was a pretty warm day, we wanted to get inside some place with air conditioning. We got there at the tail-end of the lunch rush, so we were able to have a corner booth with no one around us. It gave us an opportunity to talk.
I told her that her reading the pamphlet at the restaurant this morning irritates me everytime she does it. She asked why I didn't say something then. I apologized for not saying something but that it irritates me. I said if I would really appreciate some sort of conversation at meals, even if it's small talk. She said she would try but that I had a habit of biting her head off, especially in the morning. I agreed about that and need to work on it. I know I'm irritable any time my blood sugar gets low. I've got to start being more conscious of it and not allow that to happen.
She then told me that I needed to slow down on "asking how she's feeling" about every thing going on. She explained that I've had quite a bit of time to process what is going on with me, between my therapist and 12-step meetings. And she's only had 5 or 6 days. And she's working. She's gone to a COSA meeting, seen a therapist, lined up an appointment with another therapist that specializes in Sexual Addiction, and has gotten a book to read on the subject. Yes, she has done quite a bit. I felt stupid, apologized and told her I was proud of what she was doing and I was wrong for being impatient. I said that I need to work quite a bit on my patience as it is a character flaw of mine. She readily agreed. We both laugh.
It just felt very good to sit down and talk. Did we make everything okay? No. But we took one small step. I have to embrace these small victories and understand that things will work out in their own time and I cannot force them.
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