...Wow, 2011 is upon us. I'm excited by the new year. Last year was not the best of years for me. Disclosing my addiction to my wife was not a pleasant experience. Nor was figuring out how to deal with my addiction. I still don't have all the answers but I am on the path to find answers, solutions and ways for me to deal with my addiction. It's not always easy. It's not always fun. But I must admit that I do feel better that I am in recovery versus being in the addiction. I am trying and starting to find ways to be honest to myself and others every day in every situation. I am finding ways to express my anger in a positive way or even better, finding out what is behind the anger, or any other feelings I have.
Commitments that I've made for the year. Recovery, recovery, recovery is foremost on my mind. I will commit to my recovery program on a daily basis. This includes my daily readings, atleast 3 meetings a week with vocal shares during meetings(atleast right now while I'm unemployed), therapy (individual and other if opportunity arises), recovery workbook exercises, 12 step program steps, continue my online journal entries (not going more than one day without an entry) and a daily recovery scorecard measuring my work for that day.
Just as important in my goals for this year, is the actual application, in a positive manner, of what I am learning from my recovery program. This means that I will share emotions and feelings with Martha on a daily basis. These shares will be done in a positive manner without attacking her verbally. I will treat her with the respect she is due and not snap at her. I will apologize swiftly when I treat her wrong. I will openly and honestly keep her informed of my recovery program and setbacks. I've got to constantly be aware of whether or not I am isolating. I must make a constant daily effort not to isolate in just about everything I'm doing.
I also will get my weight under 180 pounds. This means more exercise and definitely eating much healthier. I also wish to rid myself of caffiene from my life on a daily basis. Work wise, I wish to have atleast a temporary job by month end of January. I also wish to actively get back into real estate, completing atleast 4 deals for the year.
Wow, I could go on, but I think I've set a healthy goal for myself for the year. Later today I will share this post with Martha and ask for help and suggestions from her on how I could achieve these goals. I know I've got my own ideas but I must start sharing things with her. I've got to open up my life to others, allowing them in, and quit isolating myself, thinking I know best for myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment